some space and some love

I woke up this morning with a strong urge to go outside and hug the giant oak tree in my front yard.  I love to revisit and reinhabit my hippy dippy ways and sense my 16-year-old -self smiling while dancing in Birkenstocks. I happen to be wearing a Woodstock t-shirt at the moment too, so the vibe is right.

It felt good to be quiet and still and sense the strength, the solidness of the deeply rooted trunk under the warmth of the sun. I felt as if I was hugging ancestors, maybe my grandparents who I will never not miss.

I remembered then, that last night when I was falling asleep, (for the second time, in my bed that go around, not the nap I took on the couch before bed), I had a vision of a rocky, stormy sea. I asked myself, what is the first thing I reach for when it’s wavy and I long to be comforted? What are my life rafts?

There’s been some tumult in the air as I’m sure many of you can attest to. I’ve been thinking these past weeks about my first line of defense. What’s the very first thing I do when gob smacked by life?

The answer is simple. None of it costs money or takes a lot of time. It’s always about going back to the basics and simplifying.

I put my hand on my heart, that’s the first thing I do – I tend to my aching heart. I inhale and let out a big, long exhale. I fill up on the generosity of warm, energetic, light, and the connection to all living, breathing things around me. It’s hard when the world feels divisive, but we have to remind each other and often, that in actuality, we are all one.

And everything we love and don’t is transient.

I reach out to a friend. I write. I read uplifting words. I walk, get in the nature that is available to me - and because I live in a city - that often means noticing the color of the sky, what’s blooming, or how the palm trees sway. Sometimes it’s hugging the tree in my front yard. My neighbors already know I’m weird.

I touch base with things that don’t change – the cycles of nature, the rising and setting of the sun, the phases of the moon, bird song, and most joyously, that I can make the people I love, laugh, from time to time. I’m at ease. I’m peaceful. Grateful. Even for a moment.

I take it easy; I try to help where and when I can, I don’t let negativity get me down – that’s not true, I absolutely do! But not for long! I’m a lover and a fighter!

I soften, tenderize, and look for beauty. What you look for, you most certainly will find.

I watch or rewatch my favorite show that makes my heart crackle open with heartbreak and possibility as tears rolls down my cheeks every single time. In fact, I love it so much, I usually watch it twice. If you haven’t watched, Somebody, Somewhere, on HBO, do yourself a favor. The characters are all so loveable, funny, and real.

And not that you asked, but I’m sharing anyway, you are incredible already. You don’t need to do a thing, well maybe there’s one thing, love yourself even more. Love, forgive, and accept yourself exactly as you are so you can offer this same very much needed presence to others.